Meeting the Parents

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I’ll take a break from my rants and tell you a little more about my CASA experience thus far, work on getting you caught up to date. So, on the advice of my supervisor I didn’t want to go meet Frankie’s parents alone. I contacted the DCS (Dept. of Child Services) social worker in charge of the case and we scheduled a time to go together. She ended up cancelling on me at the last minute so I had to figure something else out. I tried for about a week to reschedule with her or someone else working the case and finally out of frustration decided to try to see them on my own. So, one Saturday afternoon I drive to the neighborhood where they live to try to find the home. Not one of the best neighborhoods in town and I have to admit I was a little uncomfortable. The homes were quite run down and unkept. There were seedy looking people standing outside staring at me as I drove past. I drove around for a bit not finding house #1234 and the stares became much stronger. Decided I better just go and try something different. A few days later I was finally able to schedule to meet an agent from a different agency at the home and got better directions.

Arriving at the home there were a few people standing around at the neighbor’s watching me closely making me quite uncomfortable. I knock on the door and mom opens it. I introduce myself and she just turns and walks back inside leaving the door open behind her. Alrighty then. I went ahead and followed her in even though I wasn’t sure I was welcome. Inside were the other agent and dad. I was really surprised at how clean the house appeared to be and very happy about that I might add. Part of the reason Frankie was removed was because of the condition of the house. It had been found filthy, floors covered in animal feces and dirty diapers. There was no hot water in the home and no working fridge. Dad happily pointed out how clean the house was, then showed me they had hot water and had repaired the fridge. Dad as it turned out was quite chatting, unlike mom. Mom spent my entire visit in the living room playing on her cell phone not saying more than a handful of words. At first I was thinking they were just very young, irresponsible people that just hadn’t grown up enough to know how to take care of themselves much less a baby. Figured they just needed some guidance along with this wake up call and all would be well. But I quickly learned after listening to dad chat away for a while that his thinking just wasn’t normal and he wasn’t open to being told he may be doing somethings wrong. Example: He would put Frankie on time-out at 4 months of age because he said he was hitting him. Huh?? I tried to explain to him that a 4 month old doesn’t intentionally hit anyone and he darn sure isn’t going to know you are putting him in time-out. He disagreed and I wasn’t going to be able to convince him otherwise.

So, I decided I had seen enough and would let the pros do their jobs in trying to teach and/or counsel these 2 to be better parents. For now I had seen all I needed to see to know Frankie was better off where he was!

DCS had ordered psych evals on both parents and I was anxious to see the results!

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